While I way away, Kir met a prostitute at a disco. He talked to her for a long time, first trying to determine if she really was a prostitute, and then to learn about her life. He said she was really very nice. She was trying to save up enough money for a bribe to get into a university. At the end of the evening, she said to him, “You look tired. Do you want to go home alone, or with someone?” Kir didn't quite know what to say, so he answered “Uh, what do you mean?” And she gave such a very nice reply. She said “Well, my friends and I don’t just come here for fun. We come as work. And I can go home with you, but it will cost money.”

That just seems like such a tactful answer. I believe Kir that she was a nice girl. He said that he shouldn’t have talked to her so long, and ruined her chance at a paying customer, but he just found himself interested in her life. He also checked that she didn't have a pimp who was going to hurt her for not finding someone – he asked if she had a boss. She said no, she worked for herself.

When Kir told me this story, he ended by telling me something we both already know. He said that every single time he realizes it, it hurts that he can’t save everyone. I agree. It does hurt, every single time.

But we’re in the game. We’re trying. We do save the occasional person. Me through training doctors and teaching mothers about health. Kir through helping NGOs. We are making a difference. It’s just a small one. Bordering on invisible. Kir at least helps people he can see. He can see a good group with a good project and fight to get it some funding. I don’t even know the people who eventually benefit. But I believe that people do benefit. I believe we’re saving children’s lives.

Hard, though. Really fucking hard.

<<|>>

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USAID is one of many donors for the project I work for. The views expressed herein are the author’s own views and do not necessarily reflect those of the author’s employer or especially those of the United States Agency for International Development or the United States Government. And I mean it. I probably give the US government heart attacks.